By Belinda Luscombe

TONYA HARDING IN AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER

A celebrity wedding isn't really an occasion unless exclusive photo rights have already been sold to a tabloid magazine. So everyone should have been blissful when the celebration of TONYA HARDING's second nuptials (and her 29-year-old husband MICHAEL SMITH's fourth) were captured by a Globe magazine photographer in return for $10,000. Instead, police were called in after a guest sold a photo to the Oregonian for $100. Harding, worried that her contract with the Globe had been nullified, accused the guest, known only as Bob, of theft, saying rolls of official photographs were missing. He says he took the photos himself, never realizing it was verboten. A meeting among Harding, Smith, Bob and the photographer only worsened the situation. At the end of it, Smith claimed Bob's car hit him. Bob claimed Smith jumped on his car and Harding rammed Bob's car with hers. The Globe decided the brouhaha did nothing to diminish the value of the photos, and paid up. Who says romance is dead?

SEEN & HEARD

At last, a reason for Modern Maturity readers to watch mtv. In the video for Don Henley's newest song, The Garden of Allah, Kirk Douglas plays Satan. The 79-year-old actor, who agreed to take the role after consulting his rabbi, has no lines but lip-synchs quite convincingly--no mean feat for a man who's almost deaf.

When the New York Giants offered $1,000 for the name of a man caught mid-throw during a snowball fight at a game against the San Diego Chargers, there were plenty of takers. But Jeffrey Lange claims he has been unfairly singled out. He says he was aiming at other fans, not the field. Worse, since his arrest for disorderly conduct, he has lost his job and had snowballs lobbed at him by strangers. Ah, fame.

OLD MEN AND THE SEA

What is it about the ocean and media moguls? Ted Turner, Robert Maxwell and now RUPERT MURDOCH have all made news on the water. Murdoch, an avid sailor, helped Oracle CEO Larry Ellison win Australia's most prestigious yacht race, the Sydney to Hobart. Although he described his role as "acting as a bit of ballast," Murdoch also took turns at the grinder, in the galley and at the helm during the three-day race. And all this while injured. A few days before the race, Murdoch caught his right index finger between the sail and the boom and was whisked away to the hospital. A quick piece of plastic surgery later, he was fine, to the great relief of his many creditors. "I'll still be able to write checks," he joked.

GET ME REWRITE!

The Larry Sanders Show has some rich new material to parody. GARRY SHANDLING, who plays one of the meanest stars on TV, is being accused of being so in real life. Shandling's former girlfriend LINDA DOUCETT is suing the comedian for sexual harassment, claiming she was fired from the show after she broke up with its star last year. The couple lived together for six years, but some reports suggest it was Shandling who split from the former Playboy model. "Mr. Shandling is deeply saddened by these outrageous and false charges," said a spokesman. "Ms. Doucett's attempts to exploit and invent this matter will be dealt with through the appropriate legal channels." And, one hopes, on the show.