Waiting to Wed

A plan to avert divorce

July 1 is a day to remember for young Roman Catholics in the diocese of Phoenix. Since that date, by order of Bishop James S. Rausch, any couples wishing to marry in the church have been required to give their priest six months' advance notice. During the waiting period they must undergo a highly structured course of preparation and counseling, complete with a written "premarital inventory" that tests the conjugal attitudes of the would-be husband and wife.

Rausch's six-month rule may strike some as draconian, but the bishop is no mossback. He built a reputation as a progressive within the hierarchy during four years as the top staff executive of the U.S. bishops' conference. Since Rausch, 50, arrived in Phoenix two years ago, he has been an activist on such issues as the rights of farm workers and minority hiring, which has drawn him the wrath of the conservative Arizona Republic.

The bishop is attacking the marriage problem with characteristic zeal. Catholicism considers marriage to be "indissoluble"; divorce is not recognized and remarriage while the spouse is alive is forbidden. Yet Arizona Catholics' marriages are breaking up at a rate similar to the general population's. Rausch spent two dreary weeks pondering the rolls of failed marriages at the diocesan tribunal. Says he: "I read how these people had suffered, and decided we had to do a better job." He summoned a task force of 25 priests, nuns and laity to develop a plan. He took the task force's subsequent recommendations, including the six-month wait, to the Priests' Senate, an advisory group elected by all priests in the diocese. Rausch suggested a more flexible waiting period, but the senate voted for the six-month delay.

In the post-Vatican II style, the bishop's policy was developed through consultation, and has popular backing. Rausch was responding to outcries from besieged priests, troubled parents and Roman Catholics active in the influential Marriage Encounter movement.

The Phoenix rationale is straightforward. Marriage is a vocation. "You cannot become a plumber or an electrician in two weeks," remarks the priest who heads the diocesan tribunal. Bishop Rausch believes that lack of mature preparation is the chief cause of trouble. "We need to move our young people beyond romance or physical attraction to the sound foundations of love." It will take hard work, he adds, for Catholics to resist the trend to treat marriage and divorce casually.

The Phoenix premarital inventory contains 143 statements, originally developed by Episcopal priests, that probe attitudes and uncertainties on things like sexual fears, finances, religion, in-laws. Examples: "I sometimes worry about my future husband's (wife's) temper"; "I worry that my husband (wife) is too dependent on his/her parents." A priest or deacon will meet regularly with the couple over the half-year, and may refer them to Catholic Social Services for special counseling. Catholics who marry non-Catholics must also follow the procedure. If a couple refuse to wait and get married by a judge instead, they must undergo the same process before a sacramental marriage. Rausch will insist on the six-month rule even when the woman is pregnant and the couple face social pressure to marry in haste. He thinks that in these cases it is all the more important to think things through. The six-month policy does not alter the traditional announcement of banns on three successive Sundays before the wedding.

After the plan was announced last January, some parish priests tried it out in advance. One of them reports that of 17 couples, two decided to wait for further counseling and one pair called the wedding off. Other U.S. dioceses are inquiring about the Phoenix plan, and initial opposition among college students has quieted down. Rausch says that his mail is running 10 to 1 in favor. qed

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