Put It in Writing

If you think the law is already too much with us, brace yourself. In a new book called Oh Promise Me But Put It in Writing (McGraw-Hill; $10.50), Seattle Attorney Paul P. Ashley, 81, argues that most voluntary human relationships could benefit from written contracts--naturally drawn up by a good lawyer.

"What astute person," asks Ashley, "would consider it sensible to decide on an important business transaction while parked romantically beside a moonlit lake?" Because the answer is "practically everybody," Ashley suggests prenuptial contracts, agreements during marriage, separation treaties, post-marriage documents and agreements between lover-roommates of every conceivable gender. A premarriage contract, he suggests, might cover where the couple will live, who pays for what, how many children they will have. Cohabitants especially need legal agreements, he says, because the law has been slow to assist wronged partners in unconventional families.

Should love and affection be superseded by legal formalities? Ashley argues that a sensibly written contract strengthens a relationship by forcing partners to think problems out in advance. One woman, he reports, agreed to stop smoking but became so distraught when she tried it that her fiance broke off the engagement. In that case, Ashley concludes, the contractual promises helped terminate a shaky match. And, he notes, the written word has coercive power: "There is a tendency to live up to a written promise--or at least to make a real effort to do so--when one might shrug off an oral commitment as mere conversation, the specifics of which had long since been forgotten."

There are some unexpected pitfalls on the road to contractual bliss. For example, most states still label homosexual acts as criminal, so a contract based on a homosexual relationship might be voided by the courts. The law also prohibits agreements that "facilitate" or "encourage" divorce, and any document listing property rights that either party will get in the event of divorce may do just that. Ashley counsels "skillful legal drafting," naturally done by a good lawyer, that refers to any eventual separation as the most loathsome" of all possible eventualities.

A deft agreement, he concludes, may well become irrelevant: "With good luck, it may be found by grandmother in time to be read aloud at the 50th anniversary dinner." And if not, either partner, or both, can always sue. Naturally, with the help of a good lawyer.

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