In A Letter from the Publisher in the issue of Feb. 7, we issued a special invitation to our female readers to write to us about their experiences and attitudes as women, and to tell us how their views on this subject have changed in recent years. The following is a sampling of the response:

Times Have Changed

Sir / Being a woman is more fun than it was ten years ago. Times have changed and I with them. Only now do I realize the source of my past discontent and I relish my new-found freedom.

At times speaking my mind may make others uncomfortable, but oh what it does for me.

PAMELA LUCARELLI

Kirkland, Wash.

Sir / Women are more aware of the personal worth and professional potential of each other now. I too had sung the chorus, "I'd rather talk to men than women" and "coeds are all parrots." We joined in the great putdown, even of each other, and then, being outside the Brotherhood of Men, had either to go it alone second class or latch on to a man who would give us his "success."

Now I will not accept the injustices, oversights and cultural limitations imposed by inaccurate language and illogical concepts. I respect the right of all women and men to a full range of life-choices and to self-determination.

GERALDINE HAMMOND

Wichita, Kans.

Sir / As a member of the "do nothing" generation (college class of '59) I'd always accepted the role of wife and mother. Pantie raids came before my time and rioting, hippies and pot came after. Thirty-three years of conditioning told me that I was not very smart, not very pretty, not very strong, and that achievement really wasn't expected of me because I was female. My parents were noticeably relieved when I married.

Becoming involved in the abortion reform issue during the past year has opened up a whole new world to me. Women are at last emerging from their cocoon and saying "why?" Maybe we do have a workable brain after all. I'm having a wonderful time using mine at last.

(MRS.) VIRGINIA HANSON

Jackson, Mich.

Sir / My experience is in two fields--the arts and business. In my area in the arts (opera chorus), voice requirements preclude discrimination. In business, however, my field is communications and until eight months ago my case was classic--same work, much lower pay, no status, no opportunity for advancement. Then suddenly I was promoted to management level, a "first" with this company. Who can say why? Women's Lib, Government regulations, more enlightened executives, devoted work at any job they gave me. Probably a combination of all.

Women must work as hard as ever, but at last it is beginning to be worth it.

VINETTE BOYCE

New York City

Sir / I used to think Women's Lib was silly, but I suppose every woman has her own personal moment of realization that some people seem to be more equal than others. Mine came last year when I was the only woman elected to the board of directors of our local teachers' organization. When we sat down for our first meeting I was given a pad of paper because it was naturally assumed that I would take notes. Pow! The message was loud and clear.

Suddenly a lot of abstractions became more concrete.

For some reason I like myself as a woman more than I used to. We probably need female pride as much as men need machismo.

MARY FOX

Denver

Sir / The consciousness-raising insight that women can be leaders as well as followers is going to revolutionize social roles.

I entered a religious community at 18 and found a group of women who were used to handling their internal everyday business with greater independence from men than the ordinary woman. Sisters were hospital administrators, principals and college presidents, positions in which their lay colleagues were rarely found. Externally, of course, a male-dominated church had great power and influence over the community. It still does. But the renewal in women's religious communities has thrown many male churchmen into a panic.

Women in the church and elsewhere are beginning to influence policy and demand a share in decision making. Women are becoming leaders.

BETTY BERGER, O.S.F.

Little Falls, Minn.

Anger

Sir / Anger is my first reaction to being an American woman of today. I am supposed to tread lightly and pounce graspingly at the same time. That is to say, I should be self-assured, well educated, straight talking, logical thinking, non-wasteful and independent. Concurrently, I am to use these talents subtly so as not to appear unfeminine. Then I am told my decision-making capacities are distorted due to my constant emotionality.

You know what? They're right about the emotionality, because if this situation continues, 75% of us are either going to have psychotic breakdowns or at the very least be raving schizophrenics.

(MRS.) BARBARA ENGEL

Rancho Bernardo, Calif.

Sir / Yes--my attitudes have changed nearly 180DEG in the past four years. I am very much aware of women's issues, and I act upon my beliefs. I boycott things that denigrate women by inference (feminine "hygiene" deodorants, douche devices, etc.), or through advertising (National Airlines). My vote is heavily influenced by how a candidate stands on women's rights. I have been pushed, insulted, protected, ignored, discriminated against and outshouted into a militant stand. Enough.

ALINE M. KAPLAN

Brooklyn

Sir / I was a wide-eyed believer in the American myth (work hard, bathe daily, and all good things will accrue to you), so I entered college to study mechanical engineering.

Several years later. I'm in the personnel waiting room of Aerojet-General Corp., seeking summer employment as an engineering aide. Scattered about on the other sofas, stiff and starchy engineers. A Bull Connor of a personnel man props his elbows on the counter and bellows, "So you wanna be an eng'neer, huh? " Uproarious laughter all round. I can still feel the engulfing wave of humiliation.

MARY ST. JOHN

Los Angeles

Sir / It was 30 years ago when discrimination hit where it hurt most--in the pocketbook. Wages were low. The small loan company paid me $85 monthly, just enough to live on. One day I asked the manager why the men were paid more and he explained, "So they can support a wife and children."

"If I were supporting my mother and sister, would I be paid the same as a man?" "No."

The unfairness made me angry.

Ten years later I was working for a bank as a teller when the personnel director stopped for a chat. "I just want you to know how pleased we are with women tellers. We had been afraid the work might be too demanding, but they handle money as well as men do."

"And they cost a lot less, don't they?" I asked, but received no reply.

Frustration again and still.

(MRS.) RACHEL VANDERFORD

Tucson, Ariz.

Sir / I am 18 years old, and the thing that has me the maddest is the fact that the Milwaukee Symphony won't hire me as an usher because I'm a woman and it doesn't look as if I'm going to be able to come up with the money to take the thing to court. Yeah, let's leave things the way they are; I can always take that new waitress job I was offered, wearing black hot pants and a white stretch blouse.

"You can't take metal shop," the school officials told me, even though I desired the background for my further studies in sculpture. "You're a girl."

Damn it, I'm at the front door of my role as an American woman, but I have a terrible, haunting suspicion that that door may be too heavy for me to open all the way, and I might have to sort of squeeze in sideways. You know, my good legs could probably get me a lot of money in those hot pants.

HEIDI HILF

Milwaukee

The Children

Sir / As late as 1964 I wrote that I wished the feminists would stop trying to make us housewives feel guilty because we don't want to go out and get another job. Yet if I am honest, I must credit the Women's Liberation movement for part of my present restlessness.

Another factor in my disenchantment with Eden has been the attitude of my eldest son. He wanted someone to come to school to tell of our six months in England. I volunteered, but he said, "I think it would be better if Dad came. I could introduce him as a chem engineer. No one has his mother come!"

VIRGINIA B. CHRISTENSEN

Orem, Utah

Sir / I recently checked over my son's math homework. His answers were all right, but the problems were all wrong. In one problem the boys were building a clubhouse and needed unknown quantities of wood and nails. But while the boys were hammering and sawing, Betsy and Sue were fetching. Betsy could carry 18 nails and Sue, poor klutz, could only carry seven. The boys went on to build a raft, while the girls got to boil eggs for their lunch.

Two years ago, I wouldn't have noticed that there was a problem with math problems. Now, I figure that if the boys fetch their own nails, the girls would have a chance to build a raft. And once we ladies climb onboard that raft, we're gonna travel a long, long way from home.

CAROL KEOUGH

Chalfont, Pa.

Sir / The modern woman's concept of herself is undoubtedly changing, but irreparable damage has already been done. Trying to change a woman's long-ingrained self-image is like telling a three-year-old dog that she is really a cat.

One of the greatest challenges today is in the raising of daughters. Young girls must be surrounded by an environment that says that a girl is a human being just like a man with the same potential for success or failure--that girls are doctors, engineers, dentists, garbage collectors, accountants, mechanics and chemists. It must be slowly gleaned through years of observation. Mommy doesn't always cook dinner, and Daddy doesn't spend every hour home flopped on the sofa in front of the TV.

SUSAN J. MEKEEL

Racine, Wis.

Sir / I have thrown myself wholeheartedly into the women's rights movement, trying to make up for 44 years of lost time --not necessarily for myself but for other women who will come after me, including my daughter. It is also an involvement for my sons, too, for I don't want them growing up with the same old-fashioned ideas held generally by men about the role of women. I want each of my children to learn to live and share a life fully. This they cannot do if they cannot understand a woman as a complete equal.

JOANNE E. DUMENE

Oxon Hill, Md.

Back to School

Sir / As a 19-year-old bride, I was eager to be a doting wife, and, although I had a job, to be a perfect housekeeper as well. My life revolved around my husband. Four years later, I find myself a full-time mother of two children.

I am not a member of Women's Lib, but its views have made me honestly examine myself. As soon as the children are in nursery school, I am going back to college to get a degree and to seek a career in social service.

(MRS.) BIRGIT SALE

Ventura, Calif.

Sir / After raising three children, I went back to college and gathered a B.A. and a Masters degree in English. People who regard higher education as a key to the vault ask me, "And what are you doing with all your education?" My answer is: "Enjoying it." You asked about reordering my life--thank you, but no. It's been challenging, amusing, difficult, rewarding, and more than I deserve.

(MRS.) MARIE PRESTON HISLOP

Verona, N.J.

Back to Work

Sir / Eight years ago I was a housewife, a mother, a college dropout. Today I'm still a housewife and mother, but I'm also teaching English at a university and working on a doctoral dissertation.

During the years of my involvement with school, the members of my family have all become infected with the idea of equal opportunities for women, and we have no arguments about whether a woman should be a doctor, a truck driver, President, or subject to the draft. We do somehow often seem to get stuck, however, at details like who does the dishes or whose turn it is to clean the bathroom. Until the rise of the recent Women's Movement, I accepted the family's help with "my" household chores gratefully. Now I wonder what divine or cultural decree gave me so many jobs in the first place, and I am less grateful.

MARIANNE GILBERT BARNABY

Storrs, Conn.

Sir / No bra burner I, but my attitudes have most assuredly changed in recent years. I got my comeuppance four years ago when the Viet Nam War intruded into my snug little bridge-club and bowling-league world, and my eldest child, then 21, was killed. After six months of weeping and working myself into a psychoneurotic state, I asked myself, "What the hell are you doing to yourself and your other four kids?" So at 46 I enrolled myself in college and am pursuing a career that I always wanted to try. And the kids haven't suffered a bit. They're proud that their mother is the world's oldest living senior.

(MRS.) PAT ANDERSON

Oak Park, Ill.

Sir / Had Women's Lib matured sooner, I might have gone to trade school to become either a carpenter or cabinetmaker. I may still try it after our two children enter school. My husband approves, but my father, a carpenter, feels that in a job situation the men would be more interested in the fact that I was female than that I was coworker.

MARGARET D. LANG

Saint Inigoes, Md.

Sir / I finally admitted to myself that housework was downright boring and did nothing to challenge my intellect. So I went back to work as a medical lab technician and later back to college for my B.S. degree. At first I felt guilty, but my husband soon noticed how my spirits and disposition improved. My job gave me a sense of worth and purpose that I did not get from washing dishes and scrubbing floors.

(MRS.) LOIS O'KEEFE

Youngwood, Pa.

Ways and Means

Sir / What makes me sad is the national waste! Thousands of qualified potential doctors who were never educated, thousands of potential lawyers who were never admitted to the bar, thousands of excellent teachers who never got Ph.D.s, and saddest of all, thousands of women who have been kept in jobs which they have outgrown and whose wisdom and gifts have never been utilized.

It is to prevent this waste again, to slow it, and finally eradicate it, that I support in my heart and prayers the work of the female liberationists.

JEANNE Z. BOHN

Charlotte, N.C.

Sir / Seven years of marriage and three children later, I feel much more pressured and tied down than I did while studying (hard!) to complete my Ph.D.

I still insist that it is the right thing for a mother to stay at home. On the other hand these women should be treated as "working women"; they should receive a regular reasonable allowance plus a two-to-four-week yearly vacation which could very well be realized if there were more (overnight) camps for children and reasonably priced vacation homes.

No woman can be expected any more to work "cheerfully" on a voluntary basis around the clock seven days a week, 365 days a year!

ISLI JEITSCHKO, PH.D.

Wilmington, Del.

Sir / As a single woman, now 86, I have enjoyed my long career as an artist-writer too much even to consider becoming a housewife. Luckily I began at a time when the market for illustrations was at its peak. By 1908 six of my cover designs had appeared on The Saturday Evening Post, but since I was paid only $60 each--a fraction of what the male artists received--I quit. When the market folded, due to the Depression, I switched to writing. My many books have sold well and long. Experience has led to this conclusion: Women who want to marry, should; they may have to have a job too, for money.

What the career woman wants is respect for what she accomplishes. If she deserves it, she should have it, along with equal pay for equal work.

FRANCES ROGERS

Woodstock, N.Y.

Liberation Backlash

Sir / I've begun to suffer the disillusionment of "Liberation Backlash" already. For I've seen that for a wife and mother to return to work there is little financial gain. And since there aren't nearly enough "glamour" jobs to go around, most just trade the drudgery of housewifery for the drudgery of an office job.

MEREDITH BRUCKER

San Marino, Calif.

Sir / I am a 31-year-old divorcee, mother and sole supporter of two children, and have been a legal secretary for eleven years. At a time when Women's Lib appears to be the coming thing. I find that my views are changing contrary to the trend. I have had my "liberation" and the victory is hollow. I find at times I yearn to feel again the exotic pleasure of hurrying home to prepare a man's meal, to iron and clean--not for me--but for him. My inner self is somewhat incomplete in its "glorious" independence.

CHARLENE MURPHY

Auburn, Wash.

Sir / The unhappiest side effect that I see right now is that the emphasis on a woman developing her own creative talents is equated by most casual observers with working outside the home. Many young husbands are actually insisting that their wives work outside the home. The men really like the money, and they can claim a liberal stance.

SHARON STANGENES

Gaston, Ind.

Sir / Too late for me, but you young ones--go to it. Work your way up. Fight like hell. Don't be frustrated by dirty dishes, toilets and children. Rush out each day to that exhilarating, high-paid position; rush home to that hot-cooked supper (cooked by whom?); relax in that nice clean living room (cleaned by whom?).

More likely, dearie, you'll hold down two jobs--'cause when you get home from that executive job in the sky, there ain't gonna be no unliberated woman left (and certainly no man) to do your grub work. Join the rat race without me. I'll take it like it is.

(MRS.) MIMI WINER

Wayland, Mass.

Sir / What tastes like honey in your mouth may turn into gall in your belly. Already women have more legal freedom than they know what to do with.

This hardfisted putdown of men, marriage, femininity, etc., will surely rob women of something very special; the warm helping hand of man, whose natural instinct is to share, protect and love.

IONE BALLARD SCHURCH

Evanston, Ill.

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