Who Gets the Children?

Until recently, if the father got custody of the children in a divorce case, most onlookers concluded that the mother had done something pretty dreadful. No longer. Divorce lawyers and family experts around the country are reporting a new byproduct of Women's Lib: the growing tendency of courts to give custody to fathers.

Though many state laws make sex irrelevant in determining custody, judges have traditionally taken the view that only mothers can give youngsters the attention they need. The theory has been that mothers are inherently better fit to provide care and are at home regularly enough to ensure that the children get it. These days, however, Women's Lib has led many men and women to question conventional notions of sex roles. Increasing numbers of wives have simply abandoned home and hearth, leaving husband and children to fend for themselves (TIME, Dec. 20). There are other factors too. Since increasing numbers of women work, the traditional rationale for giving women custody now applies to fewer cases. Ralph Podell, chairman-elect of the American Bar Association's family law section, reports that more men are asking for custody and more judges are granting it.

Harry Fain, a Los Angeles specialist in family law, estimates that 25% of the fathers he represents gain custody of their children. Judge William Hogoboom of the family law department in the Los Angeles Superior Court reports that men are winning custody in 8% to 10% of all cases handled in his court, a substantial increase over a few years ago. The result, says Lewis Ohleyer, domestic relations commissioner for the San Francisco Superior Court, is that "we are actually choosing who would be the best baby sitter." More and more women now prefer to give up their children, and are not afraid to say so. They know that custody makes remarriage harder; working women, particularly, often find that it hinders their lifestyle.

For fathers, a court victory is only one round of a longer fight. A case in point is that of Lou Filczer, president of a Chicago counseling group called the American Divorce Association for Men. Says Filczer, who has custody of his 14-year-old son: "I had to learn a little about that other role, being around and being more responsive to his presence. It was tough, but we made it."

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