Hustling the Heismam Hopefuls

Shortly after he arrived at Notre Dame, Quarterback Joe Theismann was called into the office of Sports Information Director Roger Valdiserri. "Son," said Valdiserri, "how do you pronounce your name?" "Thees-man," said Theismann. "Nope," said Valdiserri. "From now on it's Thighs-man, just like in Heisman." Theismann got the message.

And so, in countless ways from countless campus press mills, has the message been put across to the 1,300 sportswriters and broadcasters who will vote later this month to determine the winner of the Heisman Memorial Trophy, a 50-lb. hunk of bronze that is awarded annually to the "outstanding college football player of the United States." Whoever wins it should award a trophy to his campaign manager, otherwise known as sports information director. Indeed, in this election year, the hustle for the Heisman has been so hard a sell that it has been difficult to tell the players from the politicians.

Down the Sidelines. In Mississippi, the entire state is in the throes of "Archie fever." The town council of Drew (pop. 2,143) has erected highway signs proudly proclaiming: HOME OF ARCHIE MANNING OF THE OLE MISS REBELS. To accommodate national TV coverage for Archie, the state legislature spent $150,000 to improve the lighting in the Memorial Stadium in Jackson, while at the University of Mississippi's Hemingway Stadium they only half-jokingly call the new artificial turf the "Archie Manning Memorial Carpet." Beyond that, there are buttons (ARCHIE FOR HEISMAN TROPHY), bumper stickers (ARCHIE'S ARMY), Archie handbills, Archie posters, Archie dolls, Archie T shirts and an Archie campaign song that has sold more than 50,000 copies. Sung by the Rebel Rousers on the Hoddy Toddy label, The Ballad of Archie Who is a twangy tribute to "the best dadburned quarterback to ever play the game":

The ball is on the fifty,

The down is third and ten,

He runs it down the sidelines;

Yes, Archie takes it in.

Until he injured his left wrist last week, Manning had as good a claim to the trophy as anyone in college football. He became known as Heismanning last season when he passed for nine touchdowns and ran for 14 more to pile up a remarkable 2,264 yds. in total offense. So far this season, he has tossed eleven touchdown passes in six games. A roll-out passer who likes to look in one direction and throw in another, the 6-ft, 3 1/2-in., 205-lb. Manning has the size to uncork the long bomb --or fake it and go powering down the sidelines. A freckle-faced country boy, he looks a bit like Huck Finn in hip pads--and talks like him too. When asked about Archie fever, he says, "The only thing I can figure out is that Archie is a different name. Maybe if it were Bill or something, none of this would have started." Not a chance.

As for Joe Theismann, his name would be rhymed with Heisman even if he spelled it Zzxyz. Since taking over for the injured Terry Hanratty at the end of the 1968 season, he has led the Fighting Irish to 16 victories and only two defeats. This season, with Split End Tom Gatewood, the nation's top receiver, as his prime target, he has hit on 80 of 126 passes to lead the nation's quarterbacks with an astounding .635 completion average. A wispy 6 ft., 170 Ibs., Theismann is what Coach Ara Parseghian calls "a darting scrambler" --a rabbity runner who can turn a broken pass play into a long gainer. He is so effective that the Irish have piled up an average of 544 yds. a game to lead the country in total offense--and total exposure. Each week Notre Dame's games are carried over 140 TV stations and 380 radio stations, statistics that may explain why Notre Dame players have won the Heisman Trophy a record six times since it was first awarded 35 years ago.

Nothing but Win. Ordinarily two stars of such magnitude would have the race pretty much to themselves. Not this season. In the year of the college quarterback, there are two other exceptionally talented youngsters with all the credentials. At Ohio State, they shout hosannas for Rex Kern, a 6-ft., 184-lb. hardcase who seems to be happiest when he is busting heads with linebackers on a keeper play. He passes very little and runs a lot; last season he was the team's second leading ground-gainer with 583 yds. and nine touchdowns. In six games this season, he has already scored seven touchdowns and gained 491 yds., for an average of 6.6 yds. a carry. The best ball handler of all the Heisman hopefuls, he has more than once faked out the entire defense --and the TV cameramen as well--to scamper for long yardage. Sticking close to Coach Woody Hayes' grind-it-out game plan, Kern is no razzle-dazzler. All he does is win. In three seasons, "King Rex," as he is called in Columbus, has led the Buckeyes to 22 victories in 23 games. This season, heading what local promoters like to call "the Team of the Decade," he is building on a record that could be improved only by the winning of the Heisman.

All of which sounds laughable out at Stanford, where Jim Plunkett is enthroned. Plunkett has smashed every quarterbacking record in the Pacific Eight Conference. His performance in the second quarter of this year's Washington State game is more or less typical. Spotting a hole in the Washington State defense, Plunkett changed plays at the line of scrimmage, faked a pitchout and raced 39 yds. for a touchdown. A short while later, he drilled a short pass to his fullback for another score. Soon after that, he coolly dropped back into his own end zone, then rifled the ball half the length of the field for another score on a play that covered 96 yds. --the longest pass play in Stanford history. That gave Plunkett a career total of 6,570 yds. in total offense and made him the greatest yardage gainer in N.C.A.A. history. He has since topped the 7,000-yd. mark, completing 132 passes and twelve touchdowns for the season so far.

A big (6 ft., 3 in., 204 Ibs.), brainy team leader in the mold of the Los Angeles Rams' Roman Gabriel, Plunkett is the kind of drop-back passer that professional scouts dream about. The pro recruiters will have to hold off until after New Year's Day, however, for Plunkett and Stanford have all but clinched a bid to the Rose Bowl, an honor that has prompted Jim's teammates to call him H.T.C.--short for "Heisman Trophy Candidate."

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