Mocking the Mockery

It was Oscar time and, like moths to the flame, the chauffeured limousines glided through Beverly Hills and homed in on a giant arc light piercing the California night. As they arrived, the stars fussed with their see-through dresses, tie-dyes and black ties and then paraded up a red-carpeted walkway. The path did not lead, however, to the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion and the 42nd annual Academy Award presentations. The setting instead was 9492 Rembert Lane and the occasion the "42nd Annual Mitchell Academy of Arts and Games" --actually the second annual gathering of a rump group of Hollywood headliners determined to mock the mockery of the Oscar presentations. TIME Correspondent Sandra Burton was there:

Among the guests of Producer Don Mitchell and his novelist wife Gwen Davis (The Pretenders) was Shirley MacLaine. She had spurned an Academy invitation this year to be a "Friend of Oscar" (award presenter). "People come to these parties," she explained, "to talk back to the myth." Lee Marvin, a 20-year screen veteran who has sat through the official Oscar event only once, the year he won ("Do you go for any other reason?"), was also there. "I'm enjoying myself this year," he said. "Any time they give you an award, you pay for it, baby. You sweat. And it's not good to sweat when you're dressed up in black tie and tux."

Ruth Berle, Milton's wife and a bellwether of In functions in movieland, chose the Mitchell soiree last week because she felt that there had been a decline in the Academy crowd of late. "I mean people like Claudia Cardinale and Candice Bergen as the 'Friends of Oscar,'" sniffed Mrs. Miltie. "The Oscar show is not an Oscar show unless Loretta Young or Bette Davis is there."

Not all of the 100 guests at the Mitchell party were real stars. Unlike their counterparts at the Oscar awards, they were making no effort to hide their boredom and hostilities. To watch the ceremonies, they divided into groups before three TV sets labeled, respectively, Orthodox, Conservative and Reform. Drinks were bountifully provided, along with lox and cream cheese and mini-eggrolls.

The majority sat in the Conservative room, where it was sometimes difficult to hear over Zsa Zsa Gabor's stream of commentary. She was particularly vocal when Hello, Dolly! nominees were in contention. "Barbra Streisand is so distasteful," Zsa Zsa muttered scornfully. Zsa Zsa also had her say about the special Oscar given to Cary Grant "for sheer brilliance." "They are trying to show he's a great lover," she carped, "but they'll never prove it to me." In mock embarrassment, Pressagent Warren Cowan reprimanded Zsa Zsa: "I can't take you anyplace." Actually Zsa Zs.a's escort was Ron Postal, the Beverly Hills haberdasher who designed Richard Burton's dinner jacket and brocade waistcoat.

Wayne in Tears. The best supporting actor award to Gig Young, for They Shoot Horses, Don't They?, was a crowd pleaser at the Mitchells, but the selection of Goldie Hawn (Cactus Flower) in the best supporting actress competition was loudly denounced as "a joke" by Ruth Berle. There was general dismay that neither Susannah York (They Shoot Horses) nor Dyan Cannon (Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice) had won. Some guests booed John Wayne's triumph as best actor for True Grit, but the sound had approving overtones. "----the Viet Cong," snarled Lee Marvin. "Get those yellow bastards, John," exhorted Laugh-In Producer Ed Friendly. "Tell us about America, John," chimed in Shirley MacLaine as the Duke wiped away a tear after receiving the first Oscar of his career.

But Shirley's mouth fell agape--and suddenly silent--when British National Theater Star Maggie Smith (The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie) won an upset victory as best actress. "Son of a gun!" marveled Hostess Gwen Davis. "They voted for a talent!" During Elizabeth Taylor's appearance on the screens, there were ribald comments about her cleavage, her saucer-sized diamond and her apparent fury over her husband Richard Burton's failure to win an Oscar for his performance in Anne of the Thousand Days. "Who is this?" asked Marvin. "She's grown up. I thought it was Shirley Temple Black." Comic Stanley Myron Handelman smirked: "She's got great elocution." But there was loud approval of her announcement of Midnight Cowboy as the best picture of the year.

While M.C. Bob Hope was making his embarrassingly reverent tribute to the film industry, the Mitchell guests tuned out ("Oh shut up, Bob Hope!" yelled Shirley MacLaine) and divvied up their own prizes for predicting the Oscar outcome. Jack Cassidy, a master student of the Academy's cynicism and sentimentality, scored a perfect seven out of seven and won a pair of cuff links. Ruth Berle, with three out of seven, took home a consolation award of an autographed glossy photo of Ruth Roman. Meanwhile, unwatched on any of the Mitchells' TV sets, Bob Hope was asking "How 'bout this show? It was a goody, wasn't it?"--unaware that he had missed the best show in town.

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