Dog Nights

Talking to reporters in Boston, Comedian Jerry Lewis was sounding jeremiads as the new season got underway. "I have no desire to get back into TV," he said. "It's dull. It's canned. It's tasteless. It's been swallowed up by Madison Avenue. Right after the dinner hour, we hear all about underarm deodorants, bad breath, dentures. It's disgusting. There is an easy way to make it on TV--you learn their ten commandments, which start with Thou shalt kill,' 'Thou shalt lie,' 'Thou shalt be a cutthroat.' "

Jerry, who does the nightclub bit these days, may be recalling that atrocious bomb of 1963 when ABC invested many millions on a 40-part series of his fooleries, then canceled out after only 13. But he does have a point. As every discriminating viewer knows, the selection factor for TV shows is not the survival of the fittest but dog-eat-dog. And last week it became clear that the new dogs are still up to their old tricks.

About the only interesting developments are a 100% switch into color, the casting of more Negroes, and evidence that the producers are increasingly getting off their back lots and onto location.

The brightest, slickest comedy of the opening week was The Hero (NBC), out of the same shop and mold as last season's hit, Get Smart. Richard Mulligan is cast as an actor who is cast as an actor in a TV western series. In real life he is a suburban dude and a sort of all-round schlemiel. Between (and sometimes during) takes, he is horse-shy, allergic to sagebrush, and as rugged as Mr. Peepers. But the sight gags are inventive, and the dialogue is literate. The only other situation comedy worth a twirl is That Girl (ABC), a sort of My Sister Eileen, starring Danny Thomas' saucy daughter Mario. She is much snappier than her material, and at 26 is unmistakably a hot new talent.

Soupy Scenario. The season's action series are ticketed for anyone from nine to 90--IQ, that is. The Green Hornet (ABC), concocted by the man behind Batman, is played straight. Only changes from the 1936-52 radio version are James Bond-type hardware and a bigger-beat theme song, blown by Al Hirt. There is nothing wrong with the show that cannot be cured by turning off the set. Tarzan (NBC) has a vaster menagerie than last season's high-rated jungle epic, Daktari, and just as soupy a scenario. Ron Ely is mesomorphic enough as Tarzan, but he is a trifle too citified--his call of the wild is Johnny Weissmuller's voice. There is no Jane, but the first episode featured Nara, a blind bush girl who got Tarzan to rescue her seeing-eye lion.

Science fiction is once again rearing its preposterous head. The Time Tunnel (ABC) meanwhile provides a new dimension for last year's Lost in Space. Project TicToc headquarters is housed 800 floors below the Arizona desert and is developing capability to thrust explorers into any time period, past or present. The first human test pilot is propelled back five decades, finds himself in the Atlantic on the Titanic. The captain naturally thinks his visitor is some kind of nut and locks him up.

Fleshly Flintstones. Another lift from H. G. Wells's time-machine gimmick is It's About Time (CBS). In this one, two moronic astronauts have exceeded the speed of light, which, according to CBS science, thrusts them all the way back to the Stone Age. There they run into a tribe of fleshly Flintstones and lots of painful slapclub humor. It is enough to make a laugh track cry to see Imogene Coca squandered in this series as a cavewife.

Returning from beyond the paleolithic aeons this season was Uncle Milton Berle, who had his moments in the comeback show, especially when Guest Star Lucille Ball was on. But the rest of the variety acts--Berle in drag, and his old pie-in-the-face gags--bombed out. Opposite NBC's The Man from U.N.C.L.E., and CBS's Friday night movie, Berle is ABC's sacrificial ham for 1966. Miltie is just one reason why ABC has at least five replacement series all ready to pop into the schedule in January. So, reportedly, does CBS, and NBC has three. They'll need them.

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