What's on First?

"Take the basic position of the Boston Monkey. Bob and weave your head and move your hips in a groovin' manner." Now you're doing the Philly Dog.

For those who need them, these instructions are supplied along with each copy of the record Philly Dog, released two months ago by a Memphis group called the Mar-Keys. Those who need them might also need to be told how to take the basic position of the Boston Monkey, but if they do they're nowhere. For in the frenzied world of the discotheque, where a dance is old while it's still new, only the sharpies and the "disco bums" are ever in the know. They know, as Philadelphia Disk Jockey Hy Lit knows, that "the Philly Dog was invented by the kids and is spreading through Philadelphia like a virus." And as everyone should now be aware, whenever Philadelphia rocks, the rest of the U.S. rolls.

Since Thanksgiving, the dance at discotheques and hip parties had been the Boston Monkey, which consists of keeping both feet still and shaking the hips and hands. But the kids got bored and started moving, so right now in Manhattan nightspots it's the Boogaloo, in which you swivel from side to side, shuffling feet, rotating shoulders and pelvis. Says Terry Noel, discaire (record selector) at the popular Arthur: 'The Boogaloo is a casual motion, a pose. It's aloof. It says, 'Don't bother me.' "

The Philly Dog, now bounding in from Philadelphia, is happy-go-lucky. It can be recognized, says Hy Lit, by its characteristic crouch, "sort of a break in the knees, like a guy on first base waiting to steal second." Dancers are also expected to clench their hands like paws and grapple with an invisible necktie, then place their hands behind the back in the "duck" position (palms outward). The dance, says one Philadelphia record promoter, evolved out of a "vulgar and risque" tail-wagging Kentucky dance called the Dog, which was banned in several cities. Says he: "The kids in Philly improvised on it and cleaned it up a little." But before adults crouch down in first-base position, they'd best reconcile themselves to being already out. For as soon as grownups catch on, it's time to change-and there goes the Philly Dog, right out in left field with the Slop, the Mashed Potato, the Batman and the Jerk.

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