Skeptic. In Atlanta, Earl Martin, 22, was fined $13 for stealing a comic book entitled Crime Does Not Pay.

Frankly Speaking. In Oklahoma City, when the assistant district attorney asked Jack Woody if he knew of any reason why he could not serve as an impartial juror in the trial of a suspected bootlegger, Woody replied: "Well, yes, I believe I do. I'm just a part-time mechanic; I'm a full-time wholesale bootlegger."

Economy Size. In Canton, Ohio, after Harris Barret, a four-foot midget, rammed his midget-sized Crosley into a bus, Municipal Judge Gordon Burris fined him $10, only half the usual fee for reckless driving.

Carrying On. In Otira, New Zealand, a health inspector reported that the Otira Gorge Hotel has only one bathroom, but two doors leading into it--one marked "Ladies," the other "Gentlemen."

Rush Hour. In Manhattan, making a quick getaway from the store he had robbed, William Clark hopped into a cab which already had a passenger: Patrolman Michael Fox, who was trailing Clark.

Private Lives. In Lemoore, Calif., Judge W. W. Sheahan fined himself $200 for drunken driving. In Pensacola, Fla., Henry Moquin, a private detective and past president of an East Pensacola Heights civic club, pleaded guilty to stealing cigars from a blind man.

Prescription. In Oakland, Calif., after receiving a postcard from her husband reading, "Are you upset? Are you nervous? Do you smoke too much? Try a California divorce for quick sedative action," Dr. Mary E. Horan, 37, did.

Capital Gains. In Groton, Conn., Michael D. Petrosky, expecting a $23 tax refund, received a Government check for $665,565.46.

Horn on the Play. In Panningen, The Netherlands, when Football Player Jan Janssen killed a rabbit which had strayed on to the playing field, cops charged him with hunting without a license.

The Long Way Home. In Miami, a runaway bulldozer plowed driverless across a block-long field, downed five trees and smashed 20 feet of wire fence at Carl Gulbrandsen's home; smashed 15 yards of fence, ripped up 30 feet of water pipe, downed five clothesline poles and several grapefruit and apples trees at Mrs. Goldie Spur's home; crashed through Frank Nowell's chicken house before coming to a halt in his garage.

Democracy. In Key West, Fla., the El Pasaje Restaurant distributed cards reading: "Local people as well as tourists are cordially invited."

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