Fleeting Triumph

During a flight of eloquence in the House of Commons on the prospect of increased duck production, Sidney Dye, Labor member for Norfolk South-West, last week declared: "Ducks greedily devour wireworms and leather jackets, thus ridding the soil of these pests. It may well be that those who eat the ducks can readily assimilate the robust characteristics of these other creatures. If so, may I commend to His Majesty's Ministers the value of ducks and green peas for a regular place in their diet?"

Next day, Winston Churchill tested the "robust characteristics" of the government by insisting that the Laborites promise not to nationalize Britain's iron & steel industry until after another general election has been held. If Churchill's proposal passed, it could topple the shaky Labor government.

Scorn & Entreaty. Labor took the challenge standing up. Government whips, grimly aware that they held an overall majority of only seven seats, exhorted Laborite M.P.s to be present for the vote. The Tory whips were busy too. As the hour for the vote approached, the M.P.s crowded into the beamed Chamber.

Clement Attlee was in a fighting mood. He said acidly: "There is to be, so he [Churchill] says, yet another election on this issue [i.e., steel]. How many elections are we to have? The Right Honorable Gentleman has had two elections on this. He has been beaten both times. Is every industry to be kept in a state of suspense until the Right Honorable Gentleman wins a general election?"

Then Attlee dwelt sarcastically on Churchill's alternate use of scorn and entreaty to win the nine-seat Liberal bloc to the Tory side. "He has been a very ardent lover of this elderly spinster, the Liberal Party," he said, and the House tittered. Lady Megan Lloyd George, 47-year-old Liberal spinster, blushed and laughed with embarrassment. Other M.P.s, with mock gallantry, cried: "Withdraw!" But Attlee went right on. "I can never make out," he said, "whether the Right Honorable Member for Woodford [Churchill's constituency] is going to play Petruchio or Romeo. He gives her a slap in the face, then offers her a bunch of flowers."

Cheers & Sighs. Fifteen minutes later, the vote was in and the tellers had returned to the chamber to report the result. Attlee's sarcasm had had no effect on the Liberals; every one of their nine votes had gone to Romeo Churchill, but not even this was enough for a Tory victory. Labor passed its first important test, 310 to 296. But Labor's taste of triumph soon soured. At week's end, the Tories chalked up another win in a by-election in Moss Side, a constituency in Manchester. This reduced Labor's overall majority in Parliament to six. If the Laborites did not start eating duck dinners in earnest, they might find that the menu had been changed to crow.

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