Jackpot. In Falls City, Neb., the judge fined Irvin J. Hunker $35 for stealing a slot machine, then fined Andy Helbert $1,000 for owning it.

Deadly Weapon. In London, Daniel Raven was convicted of beating his father-in-law to death with the butt end of a television aerial.

Fallibility. In Port Jervis, N.Y., the repair man called in to fix the cigarette machine at police headquarters found it jammed by ten phony coins. In Powell, Wyo., Patrolman Warren Schrofel, after lecturing to 400 high-school students on traffic problems, paid a $2 fine for parking near a hydrant.

Bargain. In Chicago, Zoologist Robert Bean announced that the price of an elephant, which was $4,000 last year, has gone down to $3,000.

Perfect Crime. In Electra, Texas, while P. H. Loftin was standing on a street corner someone stole his hat off his head.

Double Reward. In Custer, S. Dak., Forestry Service Foreman Steven Hoy, who treated his own wounds after an accident, received a Red Cross Certificate of Merit for saving his own life.

Mop-Up. In Methuen, Mass., the burglar who broke into Stanley Dimmock's house and stole a camera came back a week later for the flashgun attachment.

Prospect. In Clinton, Iowa, the cop who arrested two salesmen for speeding was persuaded to buy $4.05 worth of Fuller brushes.

Pain, Counterpane. In Chicago, Bedding Manufacturer Joseph P. Fanning attributed the boom in bed sales to the possibility that "people are going to bed to escape domestic and international complications."

Fitting Reason. In Detroit, Willis Walton, stopped by an alert store owner, explained how he happened to have eight pairs of pants wrapped around his waist under his coat: "I needed a pair . . . and wanted to be sure to get the right size."

Self-Made Man. In Lowell, Mass., Volunteer Fireman John W. Gatham, who is paid only for actual working time, admitted drumming up business by starting 35 fires.

Auld Acquaintance. In Van Nuys, Calif., Angel Cordova explained why he had smashed a beer bottle through the windshield of Carlos Carrillo's car: "I thought he was a friend of mine who I thought I was mad at."

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