Benefactress. In Milwaukee, Mrs. Gertrude Minor was arrested for sponsoring teen-age drinking parties, protested that she only "wanted to keep the kids off the streets."

On Second Thought. In Akron, authorities at Peoples Hospital apologized, decided that, all things considered, they had better not charge a woman patient for the tonsillectomy which had been performed on her by mistake.

It's Like This ... In San Francisco, Charles A. Dixon, arrested for counterfeiting, explained to police that he had only "wanted to make enough money to go straight."

Imperialism. In London, the Colonial Office launched a "Know the Empire" campaign, explained that 3% of Britons believe that the U.S. is still a British colony.

The Law's Delay. In Atlanta, Superior Court Judge Virlyn B. Moore, who had presided at more than 3,000 divorce cases, thought things over, got a divorce himself.

Disclaimer. In Little Rock, Ark., Ernest Horton Jr. paid a $25 fine for shooting a goose out of season, but insisted: "It was just an accident . . . I'm really not that good a shot."

Deep Cut. In Columbus, Ohio, when a married couple disagreed over the correct way to cut cards, they asked a bridge expert's advice; when they consulted a lawyer about the expert's bill for $25, they got another bill for $15.

Courtship. In Durham, N.C., Mabel Williams, refusing to press charges against Cleo Cozart, who had stabbed her, explained that they were going to be married.

Precept & Example. In Alhambra, Calif., the city was getting through its "safety month" campaign in fine shape until two police cars collided. In Dayton, Audrey Jackson, on her way home from a traffic safety lecture, suffered a broken leg when she was hit by a taxi.

Perfectionist. In Salt Lake City, the girl who described herself in a want ad as the "proverbial dumb blonde" stenographer, forgot to list her name or phone number.

Laboratory. In Seattle, S. E. Kram told police that his overcoat had been stolen from the cloakroom while he was attending class at Jewell's Detective School.

Family Album. In Chicago, Mrs. Millicent Koch divorced Claude Koch, husband No. 1 and No. 3, in order to remarry Raymond Oberg, husband No. 2.

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.