Force of Habit. In Syracuse, N.Y., when his wife shouted, "Stop that this instant!" a would-be suicide obediently cut himself down.

Cosmopolite. In Paris, 60-year-old Rene Blain, a retired colonial administrator, was forgiven when he explained to the judge that riding cowcatchers was not frowned on in Madagascar.

Grievance. Near Winchester, Ind., a bull gored the auto of Jack Townsend, the county's artificial inseminator.

Extreme Cruelty. In Lawrence, Mass., Mrs. Jeanie R. Gordon sued for divorce, said that her husband threw her parrot out the window when the bird snitched on him for coming home late. In Portland, Me., Raymond Bracey, seeking a divorce, complained that his wife not only served him pea soup for breakfast and dinner but put pea-soup sandwiches in his lunch box.

Pickup. In Billings, Mont., Robert Falls Down was arrested for drunkenness.

Specialist. In Los Angeles, for the 19th time in 37 years, police arrested Mrs. Elizabeth W. Worthington, 71, for lifting other people's possessions.

The Hard Way. In Dansville, N.Y., Hunter Les Moffat wounded a deer, chased it, finally bagged it by wrestling it into a creek and drowning it.

Flirt. In Prague, a 19-year-old youth, arrested for throwing a bottle that hit a passing girl on the head, explained: "I just wanted to get acquainted with her."

Flunked Out. In Baltimore, Librarian Ruth Jacobs hunted & hunted for the borrower of Practical Course in Modern Locksmithing, a long-overdue book, found him serving a jail term for burglary.

Policeman's Lot. In Cincinnati, Detective Herman Kahn chased Owen Donovan up & down 25 flights of hotel stairs for an hour and a half, caught him, learned that playful Donovan "couldn't sleep and decided to get some exercise."

Cough Up. In Moultrie, Ga., a suspicious policeman tapped the shoulder of a drunk, who promptly spat out about five dollars in nickels & dimes.

March of Science. In Middletown, Conn., Professor Hubert B. Goodrich of Wesleyan University announced that he had developed a method for grafting initials on goldfish.

Tattletale. In Harlan, Ky., police hunting a grocery burglar had no trouble trailing Claude Large, who had spilled the beans.

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