A-Tisket, a-Tasket. In Pittsburgh, WAC Sergeant Marcella Jones wrote to a boy friend in the Aleutians, Sergeant Ray Ellis, got back an apology from another sergeant named Ray Ellis, who had opened her letter by mistake, started corresponding with him, married him when he got to Pittsburgh on leave.

Chair on the Ceiling. In bed-scarce San Diego, a woman phoned the OPA, asked if $15 a month for the rental of an easy chair was over ceiling.

Add Gin and Lemon. In Elizabeth, N.J., proposals for a new water-supply system were discussed by City Engineer Tom Collins.

Midnight Drums. In Pendleton, Ore., Chief Jim Kanine of the Umatilla, Cayuse and Wallawalla tribes, ordered that during the cafe curfew tom-toms at tribal dances must be silenced at midnight.

Bilingual. At Fort Benning, Ga., the mystery of strange sounds in the night was finally solved when it was discovered that Officer Candidate George Chew speaks perfect English in the daytime, perfect Chinese in his sleep.

Careerist. In Manhattan, Charles Reiprecht, morgue attendant by day, undertaker's assistant by night, was arrested for trying to poison his wife.

Circumstantial. In Detroit, Mrs. Elizabeth Nicholson, mother of five, filed suit for divorce when she found a traffic ticket in her husband's pocket. The charge: one-arm driving.

Basic American. In Johannesburg, South Africa, an old lady, sitting opposite a gum-chewing U.S. soldier in a suburban train, smiled amiably, finally leaned forward and said apologetically: "It's very kind of you to talk to me, sir, but I am stone-deaf."

To Be Exact. In Santa Fe, a long-term prisoner at the state penitentiary stepped up to the newly installed soft-drink bar, remarked as he sipped: "First coke I've tasted in eight years, nine months, and two days."

Law and Order. In Atlanta, the State Senate, informed that women are willing to leave their husbands outside but not their dogs, passed a bill barring dogs, cats, and other pets from hotel rooms and tourist camps. In Nashville, for the protection of married men, a bill was introduced in the Legislature which would make the wearing of lipstick a felony. In Durham, N.C., State Senator R. A. Whitaker introduced a bill to forbid public, habitual drunkenness among judges.

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