Cups That Cheer. In Fairbanks, Alaska, Attu veterans, knocked out of the first round of a basketball tournament, left for their posts with a long winter's supply of panties and brassieres. Explained their captain: "We'll hang them up outside our huts back home and charge the boys at least a dollar a touch."

Timely. In Manhattan, Arctic Explorer Dr. Vilhjalmur Stefansson gave detailed instructions on how to avoid death in snowstorms to the annual luncheon of the Blizzard Men of '88.

Wear & Tear. In Anderson, Ind., an Internal Revenue officer was asked by a taxpayer if he could repeat on this year's return his $1,200 annual "depreciation" figure on his wife.

Proper Retort. In Manhattan's Grand Central induction center, a psychiatrist saw his opportunity, eagerly asked draftee Henry Proper, peacetime automobile salesman, if he could find him a good used car. Replied Proper: "Are you crazy?"

Calculation. At the University of Chicago, Sherman Dryer, director of the Mutual Broadcasting System's recent 30-minute simplification of Einstein's relativity theory, calculated that during their six-weeks condensation period his staff had read 25 books, written 121 pages of notes, drunk 85 cups of black coffee, taken 30 aspirins, and used up 22 erasers.

Coulee Labor. At the 1,000,000 horsepower Grand Coulee dam, workmen resorted to one catpower. To get a cable through 500 feet of winding, 24-inch drainpipe, they tied a piece of string to the cable, then tied the string to a cat's tail (see cut), then dispatched the cat through the pipe, "energizing" the animal from behind with a powerful compressed-air blower.

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.