New Jersey's jug-shaped pug, Antonio Domenico ("Two-Ton Tony") Galento, 29, was invited to take part in the Hobby Lobby program (NBC), which was to be chaired by Eleanor Roosevelt. Told that the only remuneration was fame, he waddled away grunting, "If Mrs. Roosevelt gets paid, I want to get paid."

Humorist Irvin Shrewsbury Cobb, 63, lying ill of an abused stomach in a San Francisco hospital, sat up in bed ("like a bullfrog in a pan of milk," said one reporter), and told the press: 1) "I can't say that the X-ray pictures flatter me. One of them looked like a plaster cast of Madam Perkins. I am having them retouched." 2) "Now I have to quit eating anything fit to eat, smoke nothing, drink nothing, and go to bed at 7 p. m. This is calculated to make me live at least five years longer, but what the hell for I don't know."

The Atlas of Hollywood, bear-necked Cinemactor Victor McLaglen, 52, was sued for nonpayment of a doctor's bill for "monkey gland shots" given to him periodically since 1935. "Well," he hemmed, "the doctor said they would improve my complexion."

Rumpled Columnist Heywood Broun, 50, who is always at odds with his editors, reported in his syndicated daily comment It Seems To Me that he had had a conversation with Nudancer Sally Rand. She confronted him with: "I always say it is an evil thing for anybody to speak ill of his employer. Don't you agree with me, Mr. Broun?" Said he: "This took me somewhat by surprise, for it is a notion to which I have given little thought one way or another. And since my mind was not made up, I gave an evasive answer."

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