Ass No.1

In 1926 Founder Benito Mussolini of the Royal Italian Academy was indirectly rebuked with the contemptuous words: "A thoroughbred horse cannot share a stable with asses!" when he invited Poet-Prince Gabriele d'Annunzio to become an Academician. In the eleven years since then Gabriele and Benito have drawn somewhat closer, d'Annunzio telegraphing to Il Duce when the Dictator was resisting Sanctions: "DO NOT SOIL YOURSELF AT THE FOUL-SMELLING SEWER IN GENEVA STOP REMAIN IMMOVABLE IN CONTROL OF YOUR PLACID HILARITY." Last week d'Annunzio agreed happily to become Ass No. 1, succeeding the late great President of the Academy, Guglielmo Marconi. European females of fashion are still invited by 74-year-old d'Annunzio to visit him in his eccentric villa on Lago di Garda. According to latest reports they still spend the first four days waiting to be received in sumptuous comfort, find their closets full of the most expensive and entrancing lingerie, receive every two or three hours a present carried in by a servant, such as a ring, box of chocolates, flowers, a book. Instead of an orgy, however, the big night when it finally comes now consists in listening to the Poet-Prince talk with vivid force and imagery about politics, poetry, religion and LOVE until about 7 the next morning, when his guest staggers off to her bed, finds the maid has packed everything for her departure.

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