Crown's Week

P: King Edward VIII announced that he will carry on his late father's revival of the old custom of personally giving, on Maundy Thursday (April 9), Maundy Money to "deserving" poor to the number of the King's age.

This rite, begun by Edward III in 1363 in commemoration of Jesus' washing his disciples' feet, at first required the King to wash poor men's feet, as well as make them gifts. Queen Elizabeth added the precaution of having the paupers' feet first bathed and scented in the laundry. William III delegated the washing chore to his Almoner. In 1754 stingy, stupid, lecherous George II stopped the feet-washing entirely, refused even to watch the almsgiving. British repugnance for the "awful Georges" was notably obliterated by the late George V, who four years ago revived the King's personal role in the old rite, watched in Westminster Abbey while his Almoner distributed doeskin purses of scarlet & white thongs to 67 hand-picked old men of the Parish of Westminster, 67 old women, the King being 67 years old. Since a set of specially minted Maundy Pence is a coin collectors' item worth $1, the old folks get a little more than face value for their handout. They also get $12.50 per man, $8.75 per woman, in lieu of a gift of clothing.

King Edward announced that, since he will be 42 in three months, he will give Maundy Money to 42 old men and women, and to 58 more besides to equal the number of poor who would have got the pence had George V continued to live.

P: The King appointed Queen Mary to be Grand Master of the 19-year-old Order of the British Empire, first female grand master in the history of British chivalry.

P: Queen Mary requested members of the Court to go out of mourning for her late husband, paid a visit to London's famed Adelphi Terrace, home of many a great British writer, soon to be razed for an office-building development. Escorted by the real-estate agent, she poked among the underground arches where Charles Dickens in Oliver Twist imagined a thieves' kitchen.

P:King Edward cheerfully lent his Household Trumpeters to the old folk who ceremoniously assert every year that the "rightful" King is the descendant of beheaded Charles I's daughter Henrietta. Current pretender is Prince Rupprecht of Bavaria.* This year the various Stuart societies postponed their technical treason two months out of consideration for the House of Windsor's bereavement.

P:How properly to toast King Edward was the burden of a fleet order last week. Britain's Kings have been toasted by the King's officers sitting down since the days when Britain's wooden ships gave a man so little headroom between decks that he could not stand up at mess. Last week this rule was modified to the extent that when the King's toast is drunk with toasts to the heads of foreign States, all must be drunk standing.

--(.)--

*Last week Prince Rupprecht was the only man in his home town of Leutstetten to refuse to vote in Adolf Hitler's Ja election.

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.