"Names make news." Last week these names made this news:

As part of a full-page advertisement in the New York Herald Tribune appeared a facsimile of the following cablegram from London: "PRINCE WALES PRINCE GEORGE WEARING SLIDE FASTENERS ON TROUSER FLIES STOP LORD LOUIS MOUNTBATTEN RECOMMENDED THIS IDEA TO THEM STOP FASTENERS USED ARE MANUFACTURED BY IMPERIAL CHEMICAL INDUSTRIES LTD BY ARRANGEMENT WITH HOOKLESS FASTENER COMPANY OF PENNSYLVANIA."

Announced the Warden of Vassar College: ''A girl may marry and continue her Vassar course if she wishes. She is expected to reside in adormitory unless factors in her particular case make other living arrangements desirable. . . . We do not in general believe in long engagements because of the emotional strain involved."

At 1 a. m. a forest ranger in the middle of the main street of Tonto Basin, Ariz, frantically flagged an approaching automobile. To its passengers he explained that his 15-year-old half-breed wife was in her 24th hour of labor. Out from the car climbed Arizona's Physician-Governor Benjamin B. Moeur, followed the ranger to his house. Few minutes later the Physician-Governor delivered the mother of a 7-lb. baby.

"Take a look. See eef you can find one black and blue on me." Clad only in a pink "tightie." Cinemactress Lupe Velez pirouetted before a woman reporter in her dressing room in a Brooklyn theatre to scotch a rumor that Husband Johnny ("Tarzan") Weissmuller beat her. Miss Velez: "I sue you, darlin', if you say he ponch me."

A new Ford sedan drove up to the Gettysburg, Pa. railroad station, and out stepped Henry Ford to stretch his legs. Station hawker: "Like to buy a history of the Battle of Gettysburg? Only a quarter." Mr. Ford: "Well, I know a great deal about that battle, but I'll take one." He fumbled for a coin, smiled, added: "We'll have to wait for my secretary. I haven't any money."

Philip Hofer, 36, Harvardman (1921), curator of the Spencer Collection of the New York Public Library, honorary curator of the Widener Library and of the Fogg Art Museum of Harvard, was appointed Assistant Director of the Morgan Library in Manhattan.

Wrote one Edward G. Ekdahl to Anna Eleanor Roosevelt Roosevelt after Johns-Manville paid her $3,000 for a six-minute commercial broadcast: "This continuous publicity of large and easy earnings . . . has upset the young American mind. . . . The writer has yet to be shown where anyone is worth $500 a minute.'' Replied Broadcaster Roosevelt: "I think you are entirely right that no one is worth $500 a minute. ... I do not feel that this money is paid to me as an individual, but that it is paid to the President's wife. It is not paid to me directly, but to the agency which will spend it."* Fitting a silver wig over her shaven pate (TIME, April 2), Mrs. Lucy Cotton Thomas Ament Hann Magraw, thrice married since the death of her first husband, Publisher Edward Russell Thomas of the New York Morning Telegraph, gave a birthday party for her 9-year-old daughter Lucetta Thomas. Upstairs in the Magraws' Manhattan duplex apartment, Lucetta. who receives an $80,000 per year income from her grandfather's estate, entertained eight small friends with games, ice cream, cake. Said prideful Foster-Father Magraw: "She speaks French like a native. She rows boats, plays tennis ... is an expert swimmer ... is a sculptress . . . can draw -- even comics. ... If she didn't have a cent, I wouldn't worry about her making a living." Downstairs, Mrs. Magraw, onetime actress (Up In Mabel's Room), entertained 600 adult guests, including Publisher Conde Nast, Artist Howard Chandler Christy, Socialite Mrs. S. Stanwood Menken, at a seven-hour musicale. Once she had to run up and warn the romping children: "Great masterpieces are being played. And plaster is falling on the piano." Each guest paid $2.50 to go to Lucetta's birthday party. Proceeds, some $1,500. went to wavy-haired Pianist Frank Bishop, silver-wigged Mrs. Thomas Ament Hann Magraw's protege.

*American Friends' Service Committee of Philadelphia, a Quaker charity board which does relief work among destitute West Virginia coal miners.

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