Gold's Week

Alchemist. Medieval in their great black robes and ermine tippets, a solemn bevy of French judges in Paris last week gave Monsieur Jean de Habdank Dunikowski a chance to prove in their presence that he can transmute other metals into gold by bombarding them with what he calls "Z-rays."

Switching on his Z-tube, Alchemist Dunikowski began to repeat the experiment which led several rich Frenchmen to lend him money, next led him to the Sante Prison. With a loud bang the Z-tube blew up. The French judges promised Alchemist Dunikowski (severely burned under his right eye) another chance, as soon as he can make a new Z-tube.

Hoard. Biggest of all time was the gold hoard of the Bank of France last week. Already holding $2,900,000,000 worth of gold, French bankers hinted that they might withdraw another $100,000,000 belonging to them in Manhattan. With confidence in the dollar high throughout the world, U. S. bankers declared that the French could take their gold and welcome.

Gold ingots worth $320,000 plunked into Cherbourg harbor last week while Frenchmen were unloading $24,000,000 of gold from the U. S. from the British liner Berengaria. Soon French divers had recovered all but $24,000 worth of the lost gold. When they finally gave up the hunt with shrugs, French dredges began to dredge.

76 to 60 was the vote in Capetown last week when the Dominion of South Africa appointed a commission to investigate whether it should stay on the Gold Standard or follow England (and some 30 other nations) off it.

"So long as I am premier," cried fighting J. B. M. Hertzog, "we shall remain on the Gold Standard!"

Pirate Gold found under a wild plum tree on New Providence Island (Nassau) in the Bahamas proved to consist last week of five bars worth $60,000.

Since finding them last October, Finder Gerald Fitzgerald, a fisherman, has tried to remain keeper. He sat in jail last week. Finally, he compromised with His Majesty's Government which held out for two-thirds of the cache. Grudgingly Gerald Fitzgerald revealed where he had hidden the $60,000, prepared to keep $20,000 less taxes, cursed in the hearing of sympathetic correspondents.

Just Like Gold in appearance, or almost, is Rumania's new metallic currency. Actually an alloy of small value (composition secret) it will, King Carol hopes, restore somewhat the Rumanian people's sadly shaken confidence in the coin of his realm.

Just before the "golden" coins appeared, a Rumanian priest decided to buy the used Buick of the representative in Rumania of the Baldwin Locomotive Works. A bargain was struck. That evening the priest appeared, riding in a two-horse carriage. He had with him twelve huge gunny sacks stuffed to bursting with 20-lei Rumanian bills. It took until 2 a. m. to count them--after which the priest drove off in his Buick.

Once a 20-lei bill was worth $3.86. Today it is worth 12 -c-. Last week, after the new "golden" coins were issued, a contractor called at the Bucharest City Hall to collect a bill for 200,000 (about $1,200).

"Certainly, sir," beamed the Civic Cashier. "There is your money!" It consisted of 28 sacks of "golden" coins weighing in all nearly a ton. Grumbling, the contractor took his money, carted it away in a motor truck.

Particularly handsome on Rumania's new "golden" coins is the face of H. M. King Carol II, last reigning Hohenzollern.

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