Bumper

At Charlotte, N. C., Clarence Sulp, Negro, ran from behind a street car plump into a motorcar, and without damage to himself bumped off a door handle with his head.

Wizard

At Auckland, N. Z., one "Wizard" Smith, racing a motorcar at 148.607 m.p.h. along Ninety-Mile Beach, bashed into seven large sea birds, killed them, was nearly blinded by one which he hit with his face.

Finder

In Liberty, Mo., Mrs. Elizabeth Viles, widow, last year gave to a neighbor a plot of ground in which she had for years searched and dug, dug-and searched, seeking her wedding ring lost in 1893. While planting her spring vegetables, Mrs. Viles' neighbor found the ring, returned it.

Shopper

At Kokomo, Ind., Mrs. V. S. Wiley found a dime copy of her $150 diamond ring in a dime store, took hers off to verify the similitude, found it so close, that unwittingly she threw her own ring into the bauble tray. It lay there four days, scorned by 5-&-10 shoppers.

Fooler

In Manhattan, Margaret Costello, 24. thief, stole two diamond rings from a jewelry store. When arrested (for her 15th time), she explained: "All you men are fools."

Promoter

In Bronx County, N. Y., police clapped one Sallen Haten, charged with forgery, into jail. Undismayed. Sallen Haten caused "Situation Wanted" advertisements to appear in newsheets: "Sales analysis, sales promotion and customer's control man, writes effective and productive sales letters and campaigns ... at present awaiting trial in jail. . . ."

Gypsies

In Brooklyn, one Max Rosenthal, money-greedy, found that when gypsies tucked a $1 bill under his vest, it became a $2 bill overnight, $10 became $20. Confidently he handed them $3,800 for tucking. Overnight the $3,800 became $10, the gypsies travelers.

Streetwalker

In Chicago, pedestrians eventually noticed a lost 3-year-old boy, unkempt, crying and blind. In his hand was a smudged note: "Dear Wanda, tell Ma to take care of Donald until I get on my feet again. I'm on the streets, for I can't starve. I'm broken-hearted and sorry."

Smoker

At Houston, Texas, W. H. Strebeck. barber, vaunts: "I'll match my kid against any other youngster his age for intelligence." His "kid" Edwin, 2 years, 7 months, has been smoking three big cigars a day since he was one.

Onion

At Rocky Mount, N. C., Irma Morris, 4, peeled an onion with her teeth. When the onion skin slipped, Irma Morris' head jerked back, causing her neck to break.

Gripper

At Birds, Ill., Ernestine Stevenson, 21 months, daughter of Ernest Stevenson, school teacher, fell into a cold well, bobbed to the surface, clutched the iron suction pipe until her father, summoned, crawled down to fetch her up.

Sandy

In Manhattan, Barney Manger, 57, got in the way of an excavation cave-in, found himself buried under 15 feet of sand. Extricated by emergency squadmen, 35 minutes later, Barney Manger spat sand from his mouth, asked for a "couple of highballs."

Tippler

At Atlantic City, N. J., Julius H. Quatman, automobile mechanic, excused himself from his wife's charge of habitual drunkenness: "I only get drunk two or three days at a time several times a month."

Prowler

At Saratoga Springs, N. Y., Clyde Wait. 14, heard a prowler in his yard late at night. He fired a charge of birdshot at a dark form. It was his mother, also looking for a prowler.

Whey

At Mikesville, Wis., firemen, lacking water, extinguished a fire in the home of L. P. Huber, cheese manufacturer, by pumping whey from his vats.

Stable

In Dacosta, N. J., John Cole, when brush fire razed his barn, stabled his horse in his kitchen.

Cross

In Richmond, Va., Augustus Cross visited a house he owned, found that someone had taken it away, leaving only the cellar.

Steer

In Manhattan, a Texas steer escaped from a cattle boat, careened past traffic lights down Broadway, Fifth Avenue, into Herald Square. Upsetting pedestrians, the bewildered animal paused to watch its reflection in a shop window, entered a tailor shop, sprained the spine of Nalkion Vartarian, pants presser, was lassoed by policemen, shot dead, trucked to the stockyard.

Rattle

At Rio Bravo, Calif., Frank Herbert killed a rattlesnake, discovered a $5 bill in its coils.

Radiophobe

In Manhattan, David MacVoy, 55, butcher, walked into Central Park lake over his head. The "incessant blare of radio loudspeakers had annoyed him all the day."

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.