Had they been interviewed, some people who figured in last week's news might have related certain of their doings as follows:

Frank B. Kellogg, Secretary of State: "Last week in Philadelphia as I rode in the tonneau of an automobile with Mayor Kendrick of Philadelphia, one Edward Davis, 67, darted into the traffic. We struck him, knocked him down, injured slightly his forehead. Chauffeur Eugene Stevenson was arrested, but the Mayor and I were not molested."

Judge E. H. Gary: "Every year when my birthday comes round the newspapers speak darkly of a pitcher that has gone too often to the well. Last week I was 80. As usual, I failed to announce my retirement as Chairman of the Board of Directors of the U. S. Steel Corp. I go to the office every day and stay as long as anyone. Arthur Brisbane, Hearst editor, cheered me up by a bit of smart rhetoric. 'Gladstone,' he said, 'ran the British Parliament when he was past 80; Von Moltke ran the German army when past 80, Pope Leo ran the world-wide Catholic Church at 90. . . .'"

Helen Wills: "Last week a fairly intimate picture of me was given to the public in an interview published by Collier's. But the article was ridiculously inaccurate. For example, it quoted me as saying: 'I used to play frequently with William Johnston, who has been nearly champion often enough to get it some day.' Of course it is absurd that I should say such a thing when, as everyone knows, William Johnston was champion in 1915 and 1919. Also, the article had me speak twice of an English player, named Mrs. McKane. No such character exists. One would not think that Collier's with the third largest circulation among U. S. national weeklies, would make such a stupid error."

Jim Tully, hobo-litterateur: "The October issue of Vanity Fair was published, with an article by me on my late friend, Rudolph Valentino. Of his first wife I wrote: 'She was one of the many zeros in the arithmetic of life.' Of his second wife: . 'While living with her husband in Hollywood, Miss Hudnut became so dictatorial that men associated with Valentino in the making of films did not wish to have her about.'"

H. R. H. Crown Princess Louise of Sweden: "My husband and I were lunching last week at the British Embassy in Tokyo when an evil looking man peeped in at the window. I djd not see him, for I was sitting with my back to the window between the British Ambassador (Sir John Tilley) and the Belgian Ambassador (M. Albert de Bassompierre). Sir John's son, Roger Tilley, who was sitting across the table, saw the man draw a knife and sprang toward the window as the man hurled it in my general direction. The knife entered Roger Tilley's vest just over his heart and would probably have killed him had not his gold cigaret case deflected it. Though confusion ensued I insisted that the luncheon go on as though nothing had happened. The Japanese police at once doubled the guard which attends Crown Prince Gustaf Adolf and myself."

Thomas William Lamont, partner of J. P. Morgan & Co.: "It is not my habit to write book reviews, but last week I was proud to contribute to The Saturday Review of Literature an account of Alexander D. Noyes's able volume. The War Period in American Finance, 1908-1925.* Said I: 'The change in the financial situation . . . which Mr. Noyes vividly describes has been one to affect the lives not only of America's millions but of peoples all over the civilized globe. . . . The logic of his treatment of the period under observation and the clarity of his narrative could not be improved.'"

Mrs. Marshall Field III: "I re. turned to my Long Island home from hunting in Brazil, having bagged 200 birds, 12 crocodiles, 5 capybara (large rodents), a swamp deer, many small deer, monkeys and an eight-foot, 350-pound female jaguar. Telling newsgathers how he had guided me on horseback through swampy jungles to where our dogs had the jaguar treed, and how he sighted and aimed my rifle for me, George K. Cherrie, leader of our Field Museum expedition (TIME, July 5), mentioned that my hand was trembling before I sent my bullet through the big cat's heart. I broke in, 'I wasn't trembling a bit! I was just thrilled!' Mrs. Ernest Thompson Seton, who accompanied me on the trip, did not return to Manhattan with me. She returned to the U. S. by the Pacific route. At every reference to her by the newsgatherers, I tightly compressed my lips, would say nothing. Guessing that we had quarreled, newspapers hinted that Mrs. Seton, a sportswoman with many a notch on her gun, had been miffed at getting no jaguar. . . . It was my first expedition of the kind, and I said to newsgatherers: 'Don't compare me with other women. I don't care what they do! I do what I want to do!'"

H. G. Wells, famed British writer: "My son Frank, who is engaged with one Hugh Brooks in making two-reel cinemas and who landed in the U. S. last fortnight to observe U. S. methods of direction and lighting, permitted himself to be photographed last week in the dressing-room of big-eyed Lya de Putti, Hungarian 'Famous Player.' My son sat holding Player de Putti's large powder-puff to his slightly turned-up nose, while she leaned toward him in an instructing attitude."

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle: "Last fortnight Liberty, U. S. nickel weekly, published the first of the New Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, written by me. I told how shrewd Sherlock, 'immune to sentiment,' got the better of one Isadora Klein, 'tall, queenly, a per-feet figure, a lovely masklike face.' Lest readers doubt that it was the real I, writing about the real Sherlock, I caused the famed detective at one point to say: 'By the way, Watson, I suppose you see it all clearly.' And Watson to reply: 'No, I can't say that I do.'" George E. ("Boss") Brennan, Democratic nominee for Senator from Illinois: "Last week I underwent an operation on my knee which was injured when I fell while mounting a truck to make a Labor Day speech at Nokomis, Ill. I have to take good care of this leg: it is the only one I have. The other was amputated when I was a youth working in a coal mine. Unfortunately, I am now laid up for the rest of my Senatorial campaign and will not be able to make speeches except over the radio.

However, my wife is an able talker. She will be one of a flying squadron of speakers to take the stump for me during the last five weeks before election day. My good friend, Mayor Dever of Chicago, approves of Mrs. Brennan's campaign activity--and so do I. In fact, I am helping her write the speeches."

Mary Miles Minter, onetime cinema actress: "When I was in the movies, my mother, Pearl Miles Reilly, better known as Charlotte Selby, controlled the money, before I became of age, and only last January I filed a suit demanding an accounting from her. And now my father, J. Homer Reilly, has also filed a suit asking for one-half of all the earnings I made while on the screen. I gave out no statement of the amount involved, but newspapermen last week placed it around $1,500,000."

* Published recently by Putnam's ($2.50).