Miss, Kiss, Bliss

The bill to sell and lease Muscle Shoals to Henry Ford was apparently killed. The Senate Committe on Agriculture of which Senator Norris is Chairman--George W. Norris, who was born and raised on an Ohio farm, who for many long years ardently prosecuted and judged cases in the Nebraska courts --defeated by a vote of 10 to 6 a motion to report the measure. To all intents and purposes the bill was supposed to have been disposed of this session of Congress. But the Muscle Shoals fracas was not past. Only a few days later Senator Heflin, a sup porter of the Ford offer, summoned a witness. Senator Norris, an advocate of Government operation, sat listening in critical silence. The witness was Mrs. E. A. Edmundson of Decatur, Ala., one of the towns in the Muscle Shoals region. Ingenuously, she began her testimony. She smiled genially and recalled that in 1922 Senator Norris and Senator Heflin, with other Congressmen, had made a visit to the Shoals. She re called that the good people of Decatur had given them an old-time Southern barbecue on the banks of the Tennessee. She related that she had asked Mr. Norris why he had not supported the Ford offer, and he had replied that he might if he could kiss one of the lovely Southern girls. What is more, he received his kiss, but he was still against the Ford offer. Senator Norris rose to his feet. Vehemently, violently he objected to the testimony. The surprised lady replied: "Well, you did kiss one of the girls and you are against the Ford offer. It was a betrayal!" The Senator's face was livid. "Did Senator Heflin," he demanded, "know in advance that you were going to come here and tell this story? Was this fixed up in advance to browbeat me? Is this a put up job?"

The lady was startled.

"Why, Senator, I intended it only as a little pleasantry. Of course there was nothing put up about it."

The Committee began to titter.

"The story you have told," Senator Norris vociferated, "is a falsehood. I know a blackmail plot when I see it. If you were not a woman, this would not be the end of this, I tell you. I did not kiss that girl. She kissed me. Intimations were given to me that if I did not favor Henry Ford's bid for this Muscle Shoals, some sort of thing would be hung over my head. I guess this is it."

After all, the facts were that Mr. Norris had only made his alleged remarks as an affable means of turning the conversation. But a Southern miss, some 16 years in age, had overheard and promptly popped the alleged kiss upon the unsuspecting Senator.

Mr. Heflin, native Alabaman, being more accustomed to the wiles of Southern ladies, interposed, at this tense moment in the scene, with a few apt phrases:

"It was simply a pleasant incident. I recall it distinctly. It is true the Senator did not kiss the little lady from Decatur. She kissed him. It is also true that every other member of the Joint Committee who was present was genuinely and sincerely envious of the Chairman of the Committee on Agriculture."